Captivated Me

captivate : v. to attract and hold the attention or interest of, as by beauty or excellence; enchant.

Tag: heartache

Peace.

Words are hard to find this tender week. And as I lay in bed tonight, I cannot help but think about the women, men, children, families in Ukraine at this moment as they live – maybe barely survive – another day, hunkered in bunkers in an attempt to escape lethal intent. The prayers they are praying, I wish I could partner with and echo. What they must feel, what they are facing, I cannot begin to fathom.

Home is the one place you should never have to flee from. The one place in the whole world you should be able to feel safe, at ease, at peace, sheltered from any storm. A sacred ground where family gathers, memories are made, food and music and laughter are shared, and neighbors and strangers become friends. How anyone can justify threatening and destroying these spaces – bombarding and claiming a whole country, inciting fear, displacing families, massacring communities – cannot be grasped.

Abba, Father,
This week’s events, we know, You see.
We beseech you, God,
That Your perfect peace would bring calm to chaos,
That Your might and comfort would surround the mourning, the hurting, the suffering;
Counteracting how their cities are surrounded by unjust armies and tanks and explosions.
We pray that fear would be abolished,
That evil would be extinguished.
Our hearts cry out
For deliverance for the oppressed.
For rest for the weary.
For strength for those who rise up in the face of darkness,
Fighting for light.
We pray for our world’s leaders,
That they would have Your wisdom to navigate wisely
This brutal war.

And during these painful days,
As senseless brutality invades,
May we be extra intentional –
Wherever on earth we are –
To be the sunshine, to be the peace
To our neighbors,
To our loved ones,
To strangers,
To anyone in our path.
May we be extra willful
To send our support and our prayers –
In whatever form possible –
To those affected,
Near and far.
May this become,
In ever-increasing measure,
Our normal rhythm and practice
As we journey through this world,
This life.

Peace, God. Bring it all to peace.

A lifestyle of forgiveness.

When we are deeply hurt, we can choose to tend to that hurt as if it is a fertile soil for forgiveness or we can stake it as a battlefield for bitterness. ⁣⁣⁣⁣
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Someone may have contributed greatly to your hurting heart. I am so sorry, friend. I want you to know that I am with you & God sees you. There is no excusing the fact that you are suffering. Hurt is real, brutal, and raw. And yet, I want to challenge you with an idea: that you, and you alone, are responsible for your response to that hurt. Your offender is not to blame for your bitterness, if bitterness is the response you choose. Just as they are not responsible for you offering forgiveness, if forgiveness is what you choose.⁣⁣⁣⁣

I have spent time in both camps. I have spent months steeped in my hurt, seeing life through the teeny, limited keyhole of my pain, blinded to the bitterness that was taking root within. Until that root was revealed, I spent many days confused, afraid, angry, and unable to understand why I was feeling so persistently heavy-hearted despite being in a season of life that looked beautiful on-paper. There was active hurt being inflicted on my heart throughout, but my responses to that hurt were out of proportion to the offenses, I inflicted deep hurt through my reactions to new and old pains, and I could not understand why. What an agonizing place to be! If you are in a similar place, friends, that is okay. There is no shame or condemnation. I just want to share with you: there is hope.

Blessedly, once the deeper root of unforgiveness was revealed in my life, God so sweetly and quickly helped me take care of it. It was not an easy journey. It meant confronting my hurt on a deeper level than I was aware existed, and it meant understanding that things would get more painful before they got better. But through wise counsel from dear friends from church; a paradigm-shifting book recommended to me about releasing offense (“Total Forgiveness” by R. T. Kendall); and many hours of tears and prayers and bringing my hurt and brokenness to the Lord, I am learning more about grace, healing, and love than I could ever see before when my vision was limited by pain. The journey is ongoing, and I am finding that this is a road that is ripe with lessons, richness, and loveliness. We can cultivate a lifestyle of forgiveness, friends; and in doing so, we can experience renewal in deep and indescribable ways.
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Friend, wherever you are in your journey, I want to encourage you, choose forgiveness. It’s the harder of the two choices, to be sure. It requires a humbling knowledge of how much God has forgiven us for, to the point that we can’t help but to extend that forgiveness to others. It means that the person who hurt us may never understand the depth of the pain they caused; they might not even care that they have our forgiveness. It means letting go of the false sense of control that bitterness offers and letting our heart be soft. But friend, that soft place, that’s where God’s healing and lasting work truly begins. What forgiveness does is it FREES YOU. It lightens your load, refreshes your heart, and places the situation in God’s capable hands. It breaks chains that hold you captive to the past and torture you in the form of hurtful memories played on repeat in your mind. Forgiveness allows you to move forward with peace in your heart, hope in your eyes, pep in your step, and grace in your words and actions.⁣⁣ And the more you choose it, the more it is woven into your lifestyle, the more peace & hope & pep & grace you can scatter around like confetti to the people around you.⁣⁣
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Your offender may never understand the implications of your forgiveness for them. But nonetheless, it will be a liberating gift to you. God has already offered us the gift of forgiveness in far greater a measure than we could ever deserve. What right have we to withhold that gift from others?⁣⁣⁣
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Choose freedom, friends. Forgive.⁣⁣⁣
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Ephesians 4:31-32 💛

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Anew.

Rise up anew.

Open your heart to Me again.

Let Me make you brave.

Let Me give you My strength, My joy, My freedom.

You were made to roar with gentle grace.

Not to shrink down; not to feel small.

Remember, you are My beloved.

I treasure you.

You can trust Me.

I am with you every step.

 

Shine anew.

There is light in you.

I placed it there.

It has been eclipsed by despair, by heartache and exhaustion.

You have built a wall of stone to enclose it.

I see your fear, your fear of letting it radiate forth.

You were never made to bear the burden of fear.

I sent the Remedy for it.

Fear is defeated, washed away.

Embrace the victory, My beloved.

 

Believe anew.

Let Me resurrect your sense of wonder.

Your purpose is wild and beautiful and unfolding.

Sparkle and radiate.

You were made for this.

To dream with imagination, beam with creativity.

Let your faith awaken.

I will never leave nor forsake you.

I am right here, beloved.

Be made new.

 

Shadowland.

A season of darkness, unending.
The valley is deep. The night is black.
Tree leaves rustle with tickling wind, and the march of two footsteps.
No trace of light to be found.

She rambles forth wounded in the void.
Her footing uneasy. Her heart low and laden.
Eyes accustomed to the shadows, forgetting what vivid color looks like.
She longs to see the sun.

She cannot retrace the path behind her.
Unknown how she got here. Unknown why she stayed so long.
Night fell before she could return safely, and proceeds infinitely.
Loneliness pervades.

It has been years of this.
The purpose unclear. The darkness ever looming.
But alas, this moment, she lifts her tear-stained chin and weary eyes toward the sky.
A sliver of sunlight over the mountain ahead.

Her heartbeat quickens.
Hope is rising. Healing is coming.
The valley soon to brim with glorious Light as she grabs hold of joy again.
She leaves the shadowland behind.